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Mind-Boggling Headlines
Last Update: December 2012

Rick Archer's Note: Some of these headlines are so absurdly stupid that I could not help but wonder if they were written deliberately. 

No one... REPEAT... no one can be that stupid.  Surely there has to be another explanation besides just plain stupidity.

Maybe the reason might be that this copy gets written at 1 AM in the morning and someone is in a hurry to beat a deadline.
Or perhaps the writer is drunk, stoned, or bored.  

But then I wonder, "How does this get past the copy editor?" 

Maybe the editor is stoned, drunk, or bored too.

At any rate, to me, the real mystery is how to explain why these headlines exist in the first place. 

     
 

Poor girl.  If she had been dead ahead of time,
she wouldn't have suffered.

 

 
 

Looks like she's ready to begin her own training

 

 
 

I think a bored sportswriter wrote this one deliberately

 

 
 

That is quite a scientific breakthrough

 

 
 

Anything I say will be deemed offensive by someone

 

 
 

Anything I say will be deemed offensive by someone

 

 
 

Last year they did ABC.  This year they added DFG

By the way, did you catch the misspelling?

 

 
 

Obviously Mississippi got the message.

By the way, did you catch the misspelling?

 

 
 

I suppose A-Rod should be more gentle. 
Maybe he should use his B-Rod

 

 
 

You read some of these headlines and you have to ask yourself,
"Is it possible people are really this stupid or are they just trying to see if the copy editor is paying attention?"

 

 
 

Hopefully they will survive Spring as well

 

 
 

Do you blame them?

 

 
 

Did the others come back to life?

 

 
 

Wonder if it can added to the fruit punch

 

 
 

Something was bound to hurt a little

 

 
 

And ladders help people rescue kitties from trees!

 

 
 

If ever an investigation was warranted...

 

 
 

Another mystery of the Universe revealed

 

 
 

Is that true for acne as well?

 

 
 

Some of the worst people attend those Open Meetings

 

 
 

Does the new attorney get hazard pay?

 

 
 

Gee, to think of all that wasted talent

 

 
 

What will Archie Bunker say about this?

 

 
 

Maybe they can read lips?

 

 
 

Desperate times call for desperate measures

 

 
 

No kidding

 

 
 

We should train our bodies to give more advance warning

 

 
 

How can anyone be proud of their own package
with that damn tower in the background?

 

 
 

By this logic, striking workers will go back to work in protest

 

 
 

And why the hell not?  Teach 'em to respect the law

 

 
 

This is one of my absolute favorites

 

 
 

But it saves so much money at the grocery store!!

 

 
 

A dyslexic alcoholic walked into a bra.  While he rubbed both eyes,
he asked himself why a bra is singular and panties are plural.

 

 
 

If the deaf can enjoy a barbershop quartet, I am sure the sighted can enjoy an eclipse on the radio

 

 
 

But did it save anyone?

 

 
 

Only one problem:  Civil War 1860-1865... Kitty Hawk 1903

 

 
 

The Profound Love between Siblings
 

 
 

 

 
 

I wonder if she's touchy about her name?

 

 
 

Must be a same sex wedding ritual

 

 
 

Who can swing when you are holding your nose? 

 

 
 

And what about his putter?

 

 
 

An excellent developmental toy!

 

 
 

C'mon, someone wrote this one deliberately

 

 
 

Was there anyone in the caskets?

 

 
 

These people really know their business!

 

 
 

I think I recognize him

 

 
 

They knew just where to look!

 

 
 

OMG... we could all be charged!

 

 
 

I actually remember seeing this one myself. 
I blinked at the time and asked myself, "Did I read that correctly?"  

 

 
 

Maybe they should check with God before making their ruling

 

 
 

I bet it is sitting right where they painted it.

 

 

 

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